Chicago "News" and Notes

Nascar makes its annual trek to the greater Chicago area, but in the Old Days, Nascar DID run here, albiet at Soldier Field. Too bad Nascar couldn't stay--it was the last time anyone AT Soldier Field had seen good competition.

UPS has officially signed with MWR for 2007. This spells trouble for Robert Yates, who was heard telling Elliott Sadler "If You Leave me Now, I'll be forced to consider giving a ride to somebody named 'Cale Gale'--and nobody wants that, right?"

Jeremy Mayfield has begun to make noise about possibly leaving Evernham Motorsports. Mayfield lashed out at owner Evernham earlier this week, but attempted to apoligize on Trackside yesterday, factoring in that its Hard to Say I'm Sorry for Jeremy.

Bill Elliott, despite sponsorship from Burger King, found that the golden arches are still a Hard Habit to Break, when he walked into a BK autograph session and asked for 6 McNuggets. He was promptly beaten by a man in a king outfit.

Dale Earnhardt Jr. makes his return to the Busch Series at Michigan later this year, but don't expect it to be another Saturday in the Park. He's already been booked to sign 5,000 diecast cars just to move the product (expected release date: September 2009).

ODDS:
5:1 Nascar will throw Wally Dallenbach off the track for nearly killing Will Ferrell (Wally's Response? "I'm a Man").
10:1 Denny Hamlin, despite Feelin' Stronger Every Day, will crack under the pressure of being the guy EVERYONE thinks will fall out of the top 10.
100:1 Anyone will get the running joke of this column.