Talkin' Baseball (Part II)

Today, we take a look at the junior circuit's baseball teams, and what affect they could have on Nascar.

Baltimore Orioles (Owner: Pete Angelos)--"...when asked why he bought Penske Racing, Angelos simply laughed and said it was done to further piss off Mike Mackler."

Boston Red Sox (John Henry)--Before, Mark Martin hadn't won a championship due to bad breaks, lack of reliable teammates in the 90's, and the dominance of Dale Earnhardt. Now, it'll be the Curse of the Musgrino!

New York Yankees (Big Stein)--Sure, he let Jimmie Johnson go. But his racing people kept hearing big things about Casey Atwood's potential. It was "Casey Atwood, Casey Atwood."

Tampa Bay Devil Rays (Stuart Sternberg et al)--Wow, with names like Sternberg, Silverman, and Friedman, these guys are SURE to be welcomed in places like Alabama and Georgia!

Toronto Blue Jays (Rogers Communications)--You'd better believe Ron Fellowes will have a ride come 2007.

Chicago White Sox (Michael Jordan's lapdog)--From the people who brought you Disco Demolition Night, its Bad Music Videos with Nascar Drivers Explosion-palooza!

Cleveland Indians (Roger Dorn)--"...and the Indians car sputters to a fourth straight DNF. Tonight's post race is brought to you by...Christ, I can't find it, the hell with it!"

Detroit Tigers (Mike Illich)--Nascar! Nascar!

Kansas City Royals (David Glass)--This man might be the only one capable of screwing up the Marlin-Ginn juggernaut.

Minnesota Twins (Carl Pohlad)--Finally, someone with a small-market background can show teams from the tiny town of Mooresville how to succeed.

Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim (Arte Moreno)--Gentlemen, say hello to the National Guard presents the Post It 16 Pennzoil Ford presented by Travelodge!

Oakland Athletics (MC Hammer)--They shouldn't have to offer bonuses to get drivers to grow moustaches.

Seattle Mariners (Nintendo)--Partnering up with Bill Davis would make the most sense--after all, both have quite extensive experience in losing valuable free-agents.

Texas Rangers (Tom Hicks)--Sure, they used to be owned by a man who fleeced the taxpayers for a publicly-financed stadium, then turned around and sold his shares of the team for an astronomical profit. And sure, he might have looked the other way while most of his star players took steroids. And sure, he traded Sammy Sosa for next to nothing. But hey, its not like he wound up becoming president or anything, right?