Live report from an alternate universe

Pit Reporter: "Mike, Speed Racer is on the pole for today's running of the Batman Begins 400, Speed, we've got some very cool weather here, how will that affect your handling?"

Speed: "The handing of the car cannot be stopped my father Pops Racer fixed it himself after all we need to win today's race if we don't win then we'll have no chance at the Chase and Trixie will be kidnapped by the Detriot Mafia hu-PAHH!"

Pit Reporter: "Uh...lets check in with the outside pole sitter today Racer X--X, you've been running a bit disappointing lately, can you change your luck today?"

Racer X: "I know that I might not win today, but I have to protect my brother Speed, who doesn't know that he's my brother because I ran away when I was 18..."

Pit Reporter: "X, you do know that the mike is on, right?"

Racer X: "Ah, crap."